As far as good stories go, the ones we tell ourselves are often the most powerful. We can be stirred up by these imaginings because they end up dictating the way we feel and how we interpret what’s happening around us in the world. Whether it’s keeping your job, moving on from an unhealthy relationship, changing friends that are acting more like enemies, or reassessing those tricky finances in a somewhat uncertain future economy, either way, it’s time to be careful. Whose voice in all this ruckus are you listening to? Hopefully, life is heading exactly where you want it to go and the notion of a breakthrough seems quite silly but then again, staying in your normal holding pattern could also result in a logjam where delaying vital decisions could end up carrying a significant amount of risk. Today we shall dig a bit deeper to find answers.

Our lives are like a thick pot of soup, the ingredients made up of the stuff we do every day, the happy plans we make, the regrets we carry, the joyful moments and the annoying anger that lingers. We lug all of it around. This unique mixture is important, but let us not forget that the future is happening right now and the future begins with our attitude. Many of us grow up being told we deserve everything but eventually we recognise that this way of thinking only limits our possibilities and our potential. Waiting for the ‘right time’ to arrive is an illusion, a trick of the mind, for we end up mostly waiting for others and forget what it was we wanted in the first place. Both government, policymakers and powerful financial institutions realise this habit of ours to put life on hold until tomorrow and then use it against us at every opportunity.

“Doubt kills more dreams than failure ever will.” – Suzy Kassem 

Why then, is it so easy for us to get motivated into doing stuff that doesn’t matter much? If things lack importance or value there’s less emotional energy invested and if it fails, who cares right? But if the future is happening now then everything we do is an essential part of our story. All of it matters. Over time it’s the little things that shape our lives and help us to create either a strong resolve or the reverse, living with indecision and doubt.

The history of our lives, everything we’ve done so far ends up being who I think I am. It’s my life’s special blend, the stuff I wake up to every day, you know, the job you love or hate, my family that’s loving or annoying, the future that’s bleak or alive with possibility, the financial rewards I’m scared of not achieving and the joy of reaching success.  This Pandemic has given rise to how we view things, how we interpret the world and ourselves. We now have the emergence of global governments hoping their citizens will continue to feel overwhelmed by it all, because if we remain paralysed, then sneaky things begin to happen. 

We should never be embarrassed by the amount of time we spend gazing out the window or watching the birds flit around in the park. Quiet engagement with ourselves reveals our vulnerability and therefore we have the chance to be either terrified by what we feel or lead us on to greater personal insight. It can transform us at a deep level by moving us closer to God. The truth of why we procrastinate is multi-layered and nuanced, it’s easy to say “he’s just a lazy arss” and pass it off, but that would be wrong. The real reason we are lethargic and without vitality or purpose is our underlying anxiety, we are simply scared of life and that leaves us open to manipulation by others. The stuff that’s critical to us, the things we keep putting off, these really important challenges staring us in the face simply terrifies us into inactivity.

It can feel almost impossible when having reached your later years, perhaps approaching retirement or wondering when to pull the plug at work to believe that you still have the chance to pull off something amazing, life-changing or fulfilling a dream that’s still hanging around. You haven’t been wasting time – you’ve just been preparing. The ultimate deadline is always approaching so it’s time to get off the fence to finish off the real work that you know is waiting before it’s too late.

An alternate life can be ours in a heartbeat if we can stop beating up on ourselves and of course, everyone around us. We are in an era of change and now is not the time to squander new possibilities, what a tragedy that would be. This blog is about retiring with a mindful approach, a more enduring acceptance of who we are but if we continue wandering around feeling lost, guilty or in denial then we will never face up to the errors that we are responsible for. 

Most successful strategies are pretty straightforward. The starting point is crucial. You can’t change anything until you’ve taken a good look around, do you understand what you’re seeing? If for example, things are less than you’d hoped for, then you know the messenger is standing at your door telling you it’s time to act. Remember you want to lead, not be part of the ‘blind leading the blind’. Make your plans time-sensitive, measurable and realistic and then stand accountable for your actions to those closest to you, those you love. Now – you’re almost there. 

This new world is not like the old one, hiding just below the surface of a normal suburban life is fear, uncertainty, anger and procrastination. Our goal today is not to remove this anxiety from our lives but to recognise it’s there, allowing it to remain is very unwholesome and can fester into bad thoughts. Wrong thinking in the present means wrong thoughts in the future. Either I’m wasting my precious time or I’ve been busily preparing for this moment to arrive. The choice will always be yours.